Sunday 16 January 2011

What Do Washed Up Movie Stars Do Whilst They're Waiting For Quentin Tarantino To Call?

I think I've just found a new front runner for worst film of all time. A film so cringingly terrible that no one looks good in it. A film that undoes any goodwill Quentin Tarantino had created for the cast. A film called...

Check out the trailer, next...

Honestly, I don't know where to start. I'd like to imagine that these guys live in one big house together (a retirement home maybe?), just waiting for QT to call and give their career that much needed reinvention. Again. 

Well, somehow they've got hold of a camera and produced this cinematic abomination. Apparently this was shot in 3D, but from the look of the trailer I wouldn't be surprised if someone told me it was shot on a camera phone.

It really is an everlasting battle to see what the worst thing about it is. Steve Guttenberg wearing joke glasses he got out of a Christmas cracker? Daryl Hannah's mystic guidance? Brigitte Nielsen doing her own version of Burlesque? Hang on...did he say Jews Brothers? The only person who retains any dignity is David Carradine (at least he had the good sense to pop his clogs before the reviews came in).

And then to top it all off they go and call it Eldorado. I'm guessing they're not too familiar with the crap 90's soap opera, but I'd rather sit through a marathon of that Costa Del Bollocks than watch this trailer again. It looks like we're going to be treated to this 'film' at some point in 2011 (if it doesn't go straight to DVD bargain bins I'll be shocked), so look for it soon at a petrol station near you.

Due Sometime 2011
Anticipation Level

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