Thursday 10 May 2012

CAMPUS MAN: Probably The Most 80's of all 80's Movies That Ever Came Out of the 1980's

With a poster that looks like the unholy love child of Saved By The Bell and an issue of Playgirl, Campus Man may just be the quintessential movie about a college swim team and one man's desire to make lots of money by selling pictures of them. Although perhaps not quite as sordid a concept as it may first seem, the trailer does little to make it look like a classy affair, showcasing as many men in towels as it dares to dream of.

Starring John Dye, a man who manages to look like James Spader, Andrew McCarthy and Arye Gross all at the same time, Campus Man is actually the story of a Ferris Bueller-esque mid 80's chancer, seeing the opportunity to make a quick buck by exploiting some of his hunky classmates by making a calendar of them. Quite why he decides to do this rather than, oh, I don't know, getting a fucking job, I can't tell you. What I do know is that Campus Man (possibly the vaguest title I've ever heard), is not only directed by a man with the smallest filmography I've ever seen on the IMDb, it also commits the ultimate trailer sin by clearly giving away what the last shot in the movie is. Swimming pool high-fives, anyone?

You can keep your Patrick Bateman's. If there's a better symbol of 80's excess and success than a photo of a be-mulleted gentleman giving the thumbs up whilst wearing a bright yellow sweater with a dollar on it, I'd like to see it.

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