Thursday 20 October 2011

Anyone Fancy A Dip?



Showcasing all the advanced gender politics of a teenage boy's wet dream, we now have the first teaser trailer for the sequel to last year's Piranha 3D, cannily titled Piranha 3DD. Here's hoping the extra D doesn't stand for diminished returns, and instead is just a cheeky reference to the boosted assets it has on show this time around. In other words, the tits.


I was a fan of last year's remake of Joe Dante's terror classic, which knew exactly how stupid it was and exactly what its audience wanted to see (*cough* Kelly Brook naked underwater ballet scene *cough*), but it's a different crew behind the camera this time around, so all bets are off. The return of the continuity-bothering Ving Rhames and the appearance of Mitch Buchanan himself, David Hasselhoff, do seem to suggest that we're in for a similarly tongue in cheek ride, perhaps even reaching a whole new level of ridiculousness. Shotguns for legs, anyone?


I do spy a problem in that there probably isn't many cinemas who will advertise the film with its current title. It's not overly gratuitous in any way, but your average audience will either confuse it with Piranha 3D or ask for an explanation as to why this is "3DD", a question no-one will be eager to answer. At best they'll have to advertise it as Piranha 3DD 3D, which is just confusing. I foresee them resorting to a much easier to understand title, like Piranha 2, for example. But then there's another problem, that there already IS a Piranha 2, the original sequel directed by some nobody called James Cameron. Perhaps they'll resort to adding a subtitle. The original Piranha 2 had "The Spawning", so might I suggest "The Porning"?


Hmmm. On second thoughts that's more stupid than what they've already got. Piranha 3DD should be with us in all its boob baring glory early next year. 


Apparently it's got some fish in it as well.

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